Delight and Desire

Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. (Psalm 37:4 ESV)

For years I read this verse and interpreted it in such a way that if I would just follow the Lord and His ways, I would get what my heart desires.  Yesterday, my paradigm on this verse was completely shifted as I read this verse again and realized just how much my desires have changed over the last fifteen years.  It seems that a slow miracle of sanctification has been occurring in my life and while I was learning to delight myself in the Lord, He was opening the true desires of my heart.

If you had asked me in the early nineties about the desires of my heart, it would have been a laundry list of worldly goals.  Marriage, kids, career, nice car, fashionable clothes, me, me, me. It was all about me.  After achieving those desires, I realized I was not delighted at all.  In time, I realized the Savior I met at twelve years old was waiting for me, longing to give me new and true desires.  Looking back, I can visualize His hand guiding me along the way.  Many times I swerved and attmepted to head down my own road but that always ended in a dead-end.

Along came the opportunity to educate my children from home.  It was a decision I struggled with for some time but I truly believed it was what God wanted me to do.  He put people, curriculum and a multitude of amazing opportunities in my path making what I thought would be a year or two commitment into a lifestyle of learning.  I began to realize that I absolutely LOVE to learn!  Not only that, but I long to see that joy of learning realized in each child I come into contact with.

When my daughter entered the second grade, I began to lead her small group (Sunday School) at church.  Again, I thought this was just a one-year commitment at most.  I can see Jesus smiling at me as I type that I followed that same group of girls, and added more each year, all the way through fourth grade!  This summer I will attend camp with them for the third summer in a row.  Can you hear the JOY radiating from this heart?  What a blessing this experience has been!  Not only have I been blessed by the lives of these sweet girls, I've discovered a delight that I never imagined was buried in my soul just ten years ago.

I believe each human is given a desire and there is only ONE delight that will bring that desire to the surface, JESUS CHRIST.   For so many years, the enemy of my soul fed me lies about what I thought were the true desires of my heart, but once I began to truly delight myself in the work that God gave me to do, once I began to let go of trying to become what the world said I should become, I realized those were not my desires at all.  The desires that truly give me joy:  reading, learning and teaching so I can touch the lives of others, came from Christ and for that, I am delighted.